Citrinitas — “enlightenment for oneself”

Since the cause and impetus for embarking on the Way of transformation from the disharmonious condition of an “ordinary” being into the state of a natural channel of consciousness is most often dissatisfaction — suffering caused by a destructive way of manifestation — it is obvious that the motivation for progressing along this Way mainly aims to reduce suffering. In other words, we usually follow the Way in order to lessen our suffering, our sense of being unfree and unfulfilled.

Accordingly, all the efforts we expend, all the difficulties and obstacles we overcome, are justified by the expectation of harmony and perfection promised ‘at the end’ of the Way (it being understood, of course, the Way has no real “end,” and is itself its own purpose).

And in such a motivational context there is, of course, on one hand a powerful incentive to develop (to escape suffering), but on the other hand an equally powerful fuel for egoism and an increasing dependence on external reinforcement.

On the one hand, the traveler needs to draw motivation from elsewhere, especially during periods of decline; on the other hand, dependence on a “spiritual” narcotic is no better than other addictions.

The stages of the Way — Seeking, Adeptate and Mastery, Nigredo, Albedo and Citrinitas — can be traversed only by a strong will, grounded in clear intelligence and nourished by deep feeling.

Moreover, each such transition, which passes through a stage of destabilization, destruction and rebirth, is liable — because of a temporary “loss of bearings” — to a “turn in the wrong direction” unless sufficient inertia of movement has been accumulated (the so-called “energy dinitas“). Creating this inertia is assisted by following the right direction, so strategy errors at one stage can cause setbacks later. Therefore, although from a practical point of view it may seem that “we’ll get there and handle it then,” in practice it often turns out that the wrong initial impulse caused later failures in the fall.

There is nothing particularly difficult about destroying the “old” world and entering the state of nigredo. But the goal is not destruction itself, and true nigredo is only that which contains within it the “seeds” of the subsequent albedo. All other destructions and destabilizations are dead ends and can only result in a hollow imitation, a simulation of “emergence into the light.” Likewise, the purity of albedo is constructive only when it leads to “freedom beyond self” — Citrinitas; otherwise it becomes a fresh dependency, a new defensive fortress.

And one of those illusions that leads into a dead end is the feeling of “being freed from suffering,” the attainment of Mastery (“Holiness,” “Arhatship”) — the stage of Citrinitas. At first it may seem that this stage is the goal, “personal liberation” is the most important task. And of course it is important. However, there is one point that can play a cruel trick: at the initial stage of development the sense of separateness is still strong, there is no direct link yet to chayah’s light of chayah, and therefore the direction aimed at ‘self-liberation’ may contain the seed of egoism — a kind of Yetzer hara, which undermines that direction from within.

The Citrinitas resulting from such movement is barren; merely an illusory freedom born only of repulsive force (it is apparent freedom like the wind — whose element Citrinitas seems to be — is actually governed by temperature differences). Those who attain such “liberation” (in the East they are called pratyekabuddhas — “buddhas for themselves”) remain bound to their independence, and only by overcoming separateness through universality can they pass to the final stage — rubedo.

The last of the great magi — Aleister Crowley — after crossing the abyss tried to correct that error, but even upon reaching the stage of Chokhmah he failed to escape the gilgul precisely because of the enormous inertia of the original separateness. And if that proved too much even for such a titanic personality, what hope for lesser travelers?

Therefore, even at the earliest stages of the Way one must not underestimate unity’s importance or love, and must remember that true completion — the stage of rubedo — is not merely personal liberation; it is liberation for the sake of the welfare of all beings. It is becoming a Philosopher’s Stone that transmutes every “base metal” it encounters into the gold of the Way. It is obvious that in such a view there is also the danger of self-admiration and self-exaltation, which must also be watched and changed.